This is the question I ponder and ask myself these days. How do I become just a soul?
- - - - - - - - -
Last fall, a man of God approached me at training camp in
Georgia and shared a few words of wisdom... he had some insight into a realm of
knowledge I new very little to nothing about.
Honestly, at the time, his words baffled my mind more than
anything else. The words he left
with me were not good luck on the World Race, in an encouraging tone and a pat
on the back, but rather, "When I
see you at the Awakening (a worship conference held by AIM in October)
I expect
you will be just a soul."
"Really?"
I thought in my mind, you expect I will be just a
soul.
"What?
Great, how the heck am I supposed to figure this one out, and who
is this guy anyways?"
Is this some prophetic statement?
It was mysterious and all slightly intriguing to me... yet, I
was completely unsure of the inside scoop this man had that I didn't have the
slightest clue about. Also, aware he would not be sharing with me insight into
attaining this "just a soul" place.So, my task sounded much like a confusing challenge rather than a "how
to" guide - book with a step-by-step instruction manual.
I realized I had less than one year to figure out what this
meant and then share how I had not failed him in my assignment.Slightly overwhelmed by what I was
getting myself into to begin with, I was not sure I wanted a lofty task to add
to my to do list. Thanks, and cheers to you teacher! I intend to have a lengthy
conversation with you about all of this in Ireland.
These words struck me upon receiving them and I have been
wrestling with this brief statement for the last seven months.I EXPECT YOU WILL BE JUST A SOUL.
A little perplexed and slightly befuddled after hearing
this...
I wondered what does this mean?
Is this just fancy Christian jargon... or a debonair statement
to throw off someone that is new to the mission field?
Just a soul?
I stood dumb founded yet still fascinated.
I've discovered. A hidden truth lies behind the words that
were shared with me that evening... I marvel at the way it is making more sense to
me daily than at first thought. If you didn't know, at the core of our inner
being lies our soul... one that can only be fully exposed when all outer layers
are stripped away and the very core is where you find, a rather complex matter,
the SOUL... the true essence of a person's character.
Every soul is distinctive, divinely extraordinary- a
treasure
you find at the hub of an internal being.
When all the layers of the flesh have been pulled back, you
are left with "just a soul."
Only the soul remains.
In my process of discovering if it is even possible to
become " just a soul," it has been all but orderly.The transformation has been messy, confusing, liberating,
and freeing... all the same - it is a journey.
And, I am in somewhere in the middle - not fully all flesh
and not yet "just a soul."
"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together
in my
mother's womb." - Psalm 139:6
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Words can't recount the reality that my eyes see each day.
Yet, my reality is far different from theirs.I am simply in the middle of it all, unable to often understand
my place or my voice.
I feel lost at times, amidst the chaos, the numbers, and
the language barrier. You can feel
crippled if you look at the startling truth surrounding you. Often, communicating
through a sweet handshake or a kind smile is the only option.
These are the things I do know - these are my cries.
They are - No longer children.
Already, grown ups.
Who is robbed of this simple innocence?
Who is this brave?
Who fights for them, Lord?
KEEP THEM CLOSE TO YOU.
In Mwanza, Tanzania - you are called to grow up much faster
than you might want to. You become a parent before you become a teen.
The eyes
of these children are far different than I have seen before.
Their eyes tell their story.
Their inner soul pierces your HEART when you glance at them.
They grab your hands and desire a warm embrace.
How can I love them like you, Lord?
Who reads their bedtime stories?
Who tucks them in and whispers, "snug as a bug in a rug?"
When did CHILDREN START RAISING CHILDREN?
These are my questions.
- - - - -
The answers are far from me. Only you can save them, Lord.
WHISPER to them about your GREAT LOVE.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You are a father to the fatherless; shelter these sweet ones
under your protection, all their days.
Mpeketoni Lamu is peaceful, serene and FULL OF SOUL. The
moment I stepped foot onto the pathway leading to the church I felt like I was
home again.The precious sounds of
their Swahili "Welcome" rang in my ears.I knew God had something new in store.Different than the first time, but without a doubt it was
straight from His eternal notebook.I was greeted by faces I had never met, but knew they were so very
familiar.
- - - -
How does that happen, Lord?
How do you fall in love with people you have only known for
a few days?
- - -
Somehow my soul was already connected to theirs. I had been
waiting for my heart to reconnect with the land of Kenya.It happened right when I arrived to
Mpeketoni.The conversations I
have had this month have been some of my favorite yet. If you ask God's
children to share with you how He speaks to them, it's a quite treat.
Hearing about their dreams has sparked my own spirit.Their dreams are not of selfish pride,
they desire to use these dreams for His glory.God has awakened my soul again.He has allowed me to delight in spending time with His
children. Soaking in His creation. Sharing the ways God has worked in our
lives.He has provided and never
left them alone. I am delighting
in His presence and the plans He has in store for my newfound friends.
Jonah and Jecinta... a dynamic duo. Yet, a couple full of
humility. They selflessly serve Him together. Their hearts are tied at the soul.
And, they have openly invited each of us into their life.She is a provider and nurturer.He is a protector and servant.They worship God together through their
Swahili music.
Me: "Jonah, when did you start playing guitar?"
Jonah: " I taught myself and made my own guitar out of wood
and tin when I was eight years old."
Me: "You have got to be kidding me."
Jonah: "No, I
did. (He giggles as he answers me in a Swahili accent.) I played it for three
years before I ever played a real one."
I was blown away and astonished by the determination of my
Kenyan friend at such a young age.He made use of the resources he had to pursue his passion of music that
His father has blessed him with.He has got given up.
The
hand-constructed guitar was his.It was special to him.That
was all that mattered.
He shared his dreams with me of one day opening a recording
studio. I believe the Lord has put these dreams on his heart.Nineteen years after first realizing
his gift for music the Lord is still igniting that same fire inside of him.
The studio is CARVED ON HIS HEART.Music brings Him joy. It is a part of his marriage.
Jonah is not letting these dreams go without a fight. Lord,
I thank you for the way you create your children with different gifts and
passions.Most importantly, I
thank you when they use their gifts for your glory.
Lord, I pray you answer Jonah's prayers.It has been an honor to hear he an his
wife, Jecinta, worship you
together. NEVER LET THEM LET GO OF THEIR DREAMS.
"Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from
the Father of heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. "- James 1:17
First off, Happy Father's Day... just one day belated.
I have my dad to thank for much of my spontaneity and adventure. Many times growing up he would wake my family up on a Saturday morning and say, "Get your stuff together we are heading to the beach for the night." We would respond with, "What, right now? Okay!"
This was a kids dream.
Holidays at the Simpson household are a little interesting as well. Mostly because of my father... we have been known to get in the car and go on scavenger hunts for our presents. Why do anything less than spectacular? Dad knows how to make life exciting and fun. Whether, he sticks his head out the car window to dry his hair while taking you to school or spends hours teaching you to lay hardwood floors.... he lives for the moments in life. He certainly never forgets to buy the South Carolina fireworks for the fourth of July on the way the lake either. He knows the North Carolina ones don't make it up in the air.
Sharing your HEART with your family ranks high in his life.
I appreciate the lessons my dad has taught me more as an adult. I realize more and more that people crave things that are outside of the box. Their faith ignites when called to use their imagination.And, well the Lord surrounds us with the things we love... so the Lord entrusted him with three inspired kids and he married quite an inventive an ingenious woman, my mom.
My dad's creativity has always been top notch. Growing up, I remember my dad was one of the most amazing Sunday school teachers. He always threw a unique twist into his teachings. So, when dad taught it was more of an interactive classroom rather than someone preaching to you. I remembered his lessons because he did not always go by the curriculum. Often times, this resulted in the Sunday school classroom looking more like an art class after the hour was over.
And, that was just fine... because whether he used food, glue, or an old Christmas tree to make the message impactful, it was a hit.
Last week, while teaching Sunday school in in Mpeketoni Lamu, Kenya - I had to think back to helpful hints when learning from my dad years ago. I acknowledged I had no supplies, no chalkboard, no nothing. Yet, I believe I can thank my dad for this Sunday school lesson. And, well - the Lord showed up and provided the idea for supplies. They came straight from His creation.
It was outside of the box and interactive. And, the kids were excited to join in the fun. They smiled because we complimented their artistic designs. The children felt VALUED and APPRECIATED.
Dad, thank you for being you.
Thanks for being unique within a crowd. I never question your integrity or your genuine heart. I know the Lord blessed you with your talents and I am thankful you shared them with me. I appreciate that the Lord provided such an amazing father in my life. You have allowed me to understand the importance of embracing the individual that God has created me to be. I respect you for always being yourself no matter the circumstance. It is an admirable quality.
I miss you and hope that your Father's Day was incredible. Thanks for being my earthly father and friend.
The tears I cried when meeting he and his wife, Emily the
first day of arriving to Mpekeptoni Lamu are still unexplainable.Something is different about each of
them.
I am not sure how to explain the respect I have for this man
of Christ, Bishop Maurice.He is
dedicated. DEVOTED.His love for the Father does not waver
based on his circumstance.He is
all in.He has undeniably given
120% of himself to the Lord.He
knows God's love for him is better than anything else the world has to offer.
The wisdom he has is far greater than what one should have half
way through their life. Lord, how does Maurice know the things he does?Maybe, because his intimate time with
you Lord is more important to him than his own sleep.
Three hours of prayer everyday for twenty - six years?I can't even grasp that.But, I know you have rewarded him for
His devotion to you.His desire to
be in your presence is the first on his to do list.And, when he is not in your presence he speaks of feeling incomplete
and lifeless.
Your plan for his life, Lord, is in front of his own.
- - - - -
His leadership is STRONG.The body of Christ that surrounds His church is holy.It's built on a foundation of love,
grace, and acceptance. The
children and youth look to him for wisdom, truth, and encouragement. His leadership is VALUABLE because he
reports directly to you, the Father.
God, how is this man so patient?
How is he so kind to all that cross his path?
How is he never overwhelmed by all the need surrounding him?
It's because he meets with you daily, doesn't he?
It's because he asks you what you think before anyone else,
right Lord?
I ask him questions and he smiles and freely shares.
He never neglects the precious hours he spends with you and
he listens and acts in obedience.He walks in your light and your freedom.He beams of your son, you're transforming him to be a
reflection of you.He displays
your love in a way that draws people to hear of your life.
Maurice has been my friend. He loans pieces of his heart out to others while they
attempt to find their own. I have
never witnessed a man that desires so much to just be walking in the will of
God.
What he desires more than anything in life is just to follow
you.Imagine that?
He trusts you, Lord, with everything in His life.He shares of his unfailing love for his
wife, Emily.They serve you
together.They wait patiently on
their first home even though 3000 bricks and the land is already been purchased.
Who is this man, I see?
A faithful servant.A chosen son.A wise
teacher of your word.
God, thank you for Maurice's example.Thank you for his willing heart to
speak life into my generation. Thank you for the knowledge you have given him. Thank
you for his life.Allow him to
continue to look to you everyday.
I stepped foot off the plane in Kenya and asked God to stir
my soul again.
I never knew my heart would change so much in five
months.Nothing is hardly the same.I continue to desire something more, to
know more of a grand King.I was
convinced that my heart was only connected to Africa.
I thought, God, if you
can just get me there again - then I will be completely ready for this journey.Little did I know, God did not only
give me a heart for one continent...
He has surely broken my heart for the nations.
After living in Asia for the last three months, I couldn't
help but leave a piece of my heart in the Philippines, Cambodia, Laos, and
Thailand. It is been quite a transition going from Asia to Africa. I never
would have imagined that my life would consist of traveling to remote areas of the
world and trying to love the people the way Christ did.
God, why are you so good to your children?
My mind is bombarded with glimpses of the way I have
literally experienced heaven on earth the past three months.God is working... if you don't believe it
ask Him to reveal himself to you.
God is not just working in me - He is present in His
children and His creation.
So, I am back in the land of Kenya where the Lord broke my
heart for missions.It is
surreal.
I feel different.I am different.Our team will be serving in Mpeketoni
Lamu this month and partnering with the local church.
_ _ _ _ _
God, show me more children that are on fire for you.
REVEAL yourself in new ways.
Pierce my heart.
AWAKEN my soul.
_ _ _ _ _
Father, prepare me for the second half of this journey.Rejuvenate my spirit and renew my
passion to serve you.
Upon returning here, I ask. Why am I back, Lord?What do you have in store?The Lord broke my heart in Kenya and
has pieced me back together over the last year and a half.
Every time, I think I have begun to "figure out" the majesty
of the creator of the universe I am quickly reminded that - my finite mind is
not capable of grasping His Kingdom. And, more than anything I should be
delighted to remain in awe of His POWER.
I trust Him, even knowing... I will never fully understand Him.I can rest assured knowing He is good
all the time.That is more than ENOUGH. His love is perfect and it never fails
us.
Each month on the race I have had a sizeable theme that the
Lord has presented to me. This month, in Thailand ... it did not jump out to me immediately.
Which took me by surprise and I thought,
" What am I missing?"
Or maybe, "He is teaching me so many things I just can't
narrow it down?"
Actually, this month has been more about Him and less about
me.I begun to realize I had become more focused on myself than
the Lord. It's rather difficult to
listen your teacher's wisdom when you are only thinking about yourself.
As I have wrestled and grown through:
Month 1: Brokenness
Month 2: Healing and Deliverance
Month 3: Freedom
Month 4: Prayer and Intercession
Month 5: He's in Charge: Not me
I'm slowly learning to get over myself and get out of the
way.Each of these themes is
applicable to my whole life, not just this season. God's teaching me, it's a
little easier and smarter to learn His ways, the first time around.
I don't always do that... which is why some simple lessons
are coming back around.
"Though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach
you the elementary truths of God's word all over again."
Hebrews 5:12
We can never know enough about the Lord and His ways...
The Lord has continually shocked me this year.
Over and over again, I have no idea what I need and He knows exactly. I often have no idea
what He is doing, but HE certainly KNOWS.
He knows when and why I didn't learn
something the first time.
He also
knows in advance when He is going to have to teach me again.I was shocked yet relieved to know that
my ministry this month would look completely different than I had
expected.
I anticipated that the
Lord would use me and brokenness of my past to be able to minister to women and
children enslaved by human trafficking.Surprise, the Lord knew my heart was not quite ready... the wounds would
be too real and I needed something different.
Instead of taking me into the dark alleys of prostitution ministry-
the Lord took me into a ministry of immense light in Thailand. He took care of
me as His daughter and didn't give me more than I could handle.
He showed up and said,"If you didn't remember...I'm IN CHARGE,
not just some days - but all of your days."HIS LIGHT ALWAYS SHINES BRIGHTER. In Thailand, I have seen a passion and drive from a
generation of youth and children on fire for the Lord.Selflessly seeking their Savior daily.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _
I have heard their laughter.Seen their HOPE.Witnessed their great LIGHT.
We have danced, painted and prayed together. We have walked
the markets... munched on goodies from seven eleven and sang and danced our
hearts out. Once again, the Lord
knows exactly what He is doing.
He's entrusting the future of Thailand to youth and children that are chasing after His wisdom.
_ _ _ _ _ _
Watch out, here comes a generation of fruitful believers
that are unstoppable.
They already learned the first time, He's IN CHARGE, and He
is good... all the time.
Their ready fore more... their ready for a great harvest...it's going to be breathtaking.
We put on our shoes and headed down a dusty sidewalk. Walked under the woven shack.
Immediately, we knew we were not yet done.
The Lord was not done either. He was
seeking His daughter.
She sat there. Her legs tucked to the side.Blind. No sight for 13 years. We were
ready to fight for her healing.No
more questions asked. God, use us.Let us intercede on behalf of your
beautiful daughter.
Unable to read the words in the Bible presented by Boon
Rong, her eyes were open and willing to hear the truth of the gospel but unable
to see the creation around her.
I am all in, Lord.I want to be your vessel.
There is no time to question the goodness of the creator
that wrote my story and her story into existence. He was with us.
The spirit poured down and the angels
were rejoicing.
She sat there, wrinkled and stunning.Willing to receive His love. Encouraged
by the body surrounding her in prayer. Not capable to view her surroundings but
her pupils were piercing us with great light.
We knew God was working.
Her hands were feeble and hopeful.She held them in the upright position so that she could
revere her Father as she willingly accepted Him into her heart.
What an honor to see a daughter delighted to know she had
been promised the Kingdom, an inheritance that the Lord gives to His
children.She is going to reside
in the pearly gates for eternity now.
We wept with JOY.
- - -
Her spirit was peaceful.
- - -
A humble beauty.
Jesse, Lana, Amanda and I were beaming. Giddy with laughter
that God loves us enough to include us in one of His mighty plans. They knew
too, God was with us. He is alive and acting.
Her granddaughter's hand shook,she lifted her small fingers away from her grandma's eyes and
sounds of astonished children erupted to the high heavens.
Her eyes opened and glistened like they had not yet done
before.
She has the eyes of Christ.
Maybe, she viewed a glimpse of the eternity? Or maybe, her
heavenly, Daddy?
A vision of her granddaughters smile?
She prayed.Daddy, I need to see.
I believe God is going still going to heal her sight.
God showed us that afternoon that Noi's salvation is a miracle
in itself.
An eight year old Thai boy named Jordan pointed at my
teammate Katie the other day and then to his sister and said, "same same but different."
Jordan thought they resembled one another. He did not question
the obvious fact that Katie is in her twenties and his sister is rarely a
teen.
One American.One... Thai.
Katie, a
tall young woman. Jordan's sister,
an adolescent girl. These facts made no difference to Jordan.
He thought "same same..." was appropriate
and I was not going to question the determined boy's observation. Many of us
giggled because we were not sure if we agreed.
If only I had a recording of a Jordan's voice saying "same
same but different" to share with you... that would really capture this coined statement, commonly
used in Asia.
I love this expression.
It was mentioned to me many times before I ever believed it
really existed... or that people actually buy memorable with this tagline on it.Just to explain, the Thai often use the
phrase "same same but different" when dealing with tourists'
questions.Simply meaning,
"Yes, something kind of similar to that, but not the exact same thing."
Periodically, I will feature what the Lord is showing me is the
"same same but different" throughout the remainder of the year. One of the
important things I have come to understand is this journey is not my own.
I'm privileged to share it with incredible women and men.
Each of them spurring me to continually grow... The people, the faces, the
moments, and the countries I encounter are all irreplaceable.
Without further ado... the first of many.
Four women fighting for their own freedom, my freedom, the
freedom of God's children, for the weak, the outcast and the stranger.
Jesse. Kelly.
Lana. Katie.
- - - - - -
- - - - - -
Our community is sometimes messy but it is always full of
love & grace. It's REAL.
This month, I am ministering alongside these women in Ubon
Ratachani, Thailand, a city in the Eastern part of Asia. After three months of
living in Asia, I pretty much have fallen in love with the beauty of the
people.In a country where woman
are sold, abused, forgotten, and lost... I am choosing to celebrate the women
the Lord has called me to share life with this season.
They are all somewhat
thesame same.Yet, all very different.
Daughters of a mighty King.Four souls...searching for more. Eager to learn and grow. Not willing to settle.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
They fight for the unsaved.
A Texan.An
Auburn Alum.A Redhead. A Runner
Full of invaluable insight.
Radiating with integrity.
Overflowing with wisdom beyond their years.
FULL OF POWER. Destined for greatness. Not willing to give
up.
I will not underestimate their unique callings.
Each has the heartbeat of Christ.
Keep lifting up the ladies of Team Powerhouse in prayer while we are ministering together in Thailand this month.
Our team of seven took one quick look at the vehicle and
thought, "Where in the world are we going to fit."We squeezed in all right, and headed three hours to Ampail,
the breathtaking Camodian countryside, where we made our home admist the trees
for the last two weeks.The transportation
was not suave by any means. Yet the sites were incredible.
In a land full of ripe mangos, open acres of lush harvest,
and warm hosts, I began to appreciate...
the simplicity of an unfussy lifestyle.
Often, I desire to freeze frame an image in my mind. If only
I could have a second longer to engrave the sounds, the smells, or the sights into
my heart.It's almost impossible,
to recreate such heavenly glimpses of God's creation and get enough of His
children that reveal His true character.
Lida smiles.A widow.She lost her husband 10 years ago. We shared the backend of a dusty pick
up with twenty other Cambodians, seven Americans including myself, 30+ bags of
luggage and headed across the river 13 days ago.Little did I know, God would cross our paths again my last
night in Ampail. I sat worshiping
in awe of how God never fails to intertwine the miniscule details.Lida'shome was
full of neighbors, both old and new.They gathered alongside Lida and her two children to praise the
Lord.She is healing from her loss
and joyful to no longer worship a false idol.Abba, mend her wounds. Fill her with your perfect love.
Pastor You I.Not yet thirty.
Full of humility.A delightful host.A man of
integrity. Surrendered his life to the Lord in 2000. A passionate warrior.He is discipling a generation of young
and vibrant Cambodians.
He is
bringing light to dark places. Going against the grain in his village and
seeking to change hearts and share the truth of the gospel.He began sharing the gospel with
children under a tree, years later God literally blessed him with a church in a
tree. Father, cover him with your
armor.
Sok Vin.A
gifted musician. A unique teen.
Sok Vin spends time worshiping the Lord through the sounds he creates.Nothing separates him from the feeling
He gets when he plays the instrument.He desires to live in a true community.He has it figured out.Surround yourself with wise elders that you can learn from.He is protected.Keep him strong, Lord.
Sive Heng. A beautiful heart.
She cried out for
her parent's freedom.
All she
desired was an opportunity to share Christ with them.
Her smile was warm.Her prayer and tears were pure.
Her love for her sisters was evident.Lord, answer her cries.
You Try.Twenty
years wise.A leader and mentor to
his friends and peers.He has the
heart to fight for people.The
life and energy he radiates is contagious.The Lord is doing a mighty work in this man. He knows that
rushing through life is not the way to live.Lord, raise him to greatness.
Home.
A
Tree house.
The church.
Dark ebony.
A place of worship.
A retreat in the sky.
Covered by a thin mosquito
netting at night and looking outside at the stars, I had to remind myself that
this was my reality.Lord, protect
this treasure.
Our eating.Simplistic
and cooked by loving hands.Dining
on the floor and watching generations of Cambodian youth willingly squat or sit
on the floor to prepare every meal was breathtaking. Nothing like it.Spoonfuls of deliciousness.
Lord, you always satisfy your children's hunger.
Just a few of the sweet
blessings the Lord craved out in Cambodia.